A little introduction

Hello there. This is the blog of a girl who, after many failed attempts, is tyring a new approach to getting better. Before I start, this is NOT a pro-ana site or anything along those lines. It is simply a blog acting as an online diary for a girl trying to beat her eating disorder and jot down her other feelings.

Okay. I am going to write under the pseudonym Nia Maxwell.
I am in my late teens and since the age of 15 I've suffered from bullimia although in recent months it's been the worst I've ever had it. At the minute, I am sick after everything I eat, including breakfast. My mouth is currently a beacon of ulcers and blood-blisters, and my throat is always sore and scratchy. The back of my tongue is rough and red from my fingers and, the worst part yet, my teeth are really beginning to show the effects of my constant purging.

I am purging about... 4/5 times a day. Up until about October/November 2008, it was only once, maybe twice a day.

Subsequently, my depression has became a lot worse! My Dad passed away in 2005 when I was just 13 (a little insight into my age). Since then, me and my Mum have not got on at all. After his death my weight ballooned a bit. I have no idea what I was at the time nor what I was at my heaviest, but I went from UK size 8/10 to quite a big 14 (for the US, that's 4/6 to 10).
It wasn't just my weight that bothered me but the size I was. I was depressed and hated the way I looked. I wore nothing but plain t-shirts, quite loose fitting jeans and big, black hoodies.

When I was about 15, I decided enough was enough and went on a drastic diet. I gave up chocolate, crisps, pop, anything sweet/unhealthy, all other junk food and pasta for lent. I don't know how much weight I lost but I'm guessing about 7/8 lbs.

It was around this time I became bullimic. And I've been bulimic ever since.

In 2006 after a big arguement with my Mum, I cut my wrists. The cuts weren't deep and they barely drew blood but it was my first experience of self-harm.
It is now February 2009 and it's safe to say I am now definately a self-harmer. My left arm is covered in deep, bleeding slits. This is something I want to conquere also.

So there we have it. I'm a british teenage girl with a serious case of bulimia who self-harms daily and wants to get healthy and lose weight the proper way.